The Moment of Truth...

Last week I went to a holiday party for an online newspaper in the city. I guess I should preface this story with the fact that I found out about this open party while cyber-stalking The Kid. I read his twitter, I "know" his friends, and one of them happens to write for this site and I knew The Friend would at least be there. Whether or not The Kid would be...well...I didn't want to think that far ahead.

I asked some friends to go with me and we were off. I think I looked pretty good that night...so I was ready to have some fun. We got there and the place was filled with hipsters and freaks. But the beer was free and I was on a mission to meet The Kid's friend. After some asking around, I finally get introduced to The Friend. He's adorable and friendly and seemed so thankful that I read his stuff (I tried VERY hard to make sure there was no mention of the fact that it was my cyber-stalking that led me to his site...) I came across a lot less cool than I had hoped...almost groupie-esque and a bit of a bumbling idiot...but I was nervous. In my head, I'd meet The Friend, he'd think I was cool as shit, and he'd mention to The Kid the next day about this cool as shit hot girl, and the kid would be intrigued, and we'd meet and later find we "knew" each other all along. (I am a FREAK...I know...)

In any case, that was that...until...IN WALKS THE KID! I knew immediately it was him. It was this odd experience like a spotlight was shown down on him. Online, The Kids pictures all look so different that I was pretty sure I wouldn't recognize him on the street if I ever bumped into him. I was so wrong. I knew. I think I lost all feeling in my limbs and the blood rushed from my face. How does this 25 year old who I have never met have this kind of effect over me?

After about 1/2 hour of him mingling, I see him go to the bar...so I casually go up as well...but I couldn't face him. I wasn't ready to either 1) have him recognize me or 2) introduce myself to him. So, I walked away.

Later, as I'm standing with my friends at a table near the bathroom, who do I notice right behind me but The Kid waiting in line. I almost died. I wanted him to tap me on the shoulder with his gorgeous smile and tell me he knew exactly who I was. He didn't. Oddly, however, The Friend approached me again and struck up more conversation. I was, at this point, both faded and in some alternate-reality being this close to The Kid in real life, so I was even more of an idiot when talking to The Friend. In any case, The Friend mentioned his design partner and points to The Kid. I can't even look and pretend I don't even hear him. I just didn't have the guts and it was all too much torture.

I bid my adieu to The Friend, grabbed my stuff with my posse, and then and there, with The Kid still in line for the bathroom, and having not introduced myself...we left...

And there you have it...I was too chicken to meet The Kid...and I'm kicking myself for it...as I'm certain that it was my one and only chance to make it happen...all the while trying to console myself with the reminder that he's only 25 and it all wouldn't matter anyway...

Bah...